Before The Year Ends...
Everywhere you look, there’s a countdown to the New Year–specifically, the new decade.
Over the last few weeks, I’ve observed as many set into place extensive changes to be made well-before the clock strikes midnight on New Year’s,--with a greater emphasis on what’s not continuing into the new year versus what will.
To be transparent, I, too, began to wonder what my groundbreaking change be? (If there was to be one.)
For the most part, 2019 was a year of tranquility for me. Now, this reflection is not to overlook the obstacles I endured because there indeed were obstacles. In hindsight, 2019 grounded me and molded a core that I now know to be not easily shaken.
To share a few highlights: I traveled to Paris. I was stronger than ever in my personal battle against anxiety. My heart remained intact (what’s that Drake line?: “You ain’t stressin’ off no lover in the past tense, you already had that.”) With the exception of fracturing my pinky finger (don’t ask), 2019 was my Nice For What year.
And then life happened.
Oddly enough, my lessons from 2019 were taught in its final quarter. An emotionally taxing sequence of events made way for an unexpected goodbye that ultimately left a wound I was unsure of how to nurse. It was the ending to a chapter that I wasn’t, nor did I ever think that I would have to, finish writing.
Life has showed me that many can coach you into cutting ties with others, but not many can coach you on how to heal once the damage is done. (sidenote: the best advice, is to not take advice from everybody.)
Earlier this year, viral video showed a hotel receptionist calmly telling a guest, “It’s above me now,” after she verbally accosted him. Like him, I’ve acknowledged that many things are “above us,” and conflicts don’t always have to evolve into battles. Sometimes, relinquishing that urge to maintain control, is all the step one needs to take.
So before this year ends and another begins, remember this: there’s nothing wrong with bowing out, just do so gracefully.
-The Pen